A week or so ago I ended my two year tenure as a marketing manager for a non-profit dance company in Maryland. It wasn't an easy decision. I went from a part-time job to no job. And I'm doing it with bills that come every month and an almost 2-year-old whose feet are growing at a rapid pace. :)
Why did I leave my job?
My Spirit didn't feel right. Seriously, my body and Spirit did not feel good. Not because of the work or the people...the work was good and the people were great but I felt that I was spending all of my time trying to get my work done once Kade went to bed and I had little time for Tyrone or myself. There was no time for me to do my writing or other creative projects. Plus I was always tired. Now part of that tiredness has to do with being the full time mom of a VERY active baby boy but it also had to do with being mentally drained.
Recently I read the book Rest Is Resistance, A Manifesto by Tricia Hersey. There was so much in this book that resonated with me around grind culture, rest refueling the imagination, rest in and of itself being protest against a capitalist society, and so much more. But one of the things she shared in her book that I connected with most was this:
Grinding keeps us in a cycle of trauma; rest disturbs and disrupts this cycle. Rest is an ethos of reclaiming your body as your own. Rest provides a portal for healing, imagination, and communication with our Ancestors. — excerpt from Rest Is Resistance, A Manifesto by Tricia Hersey
I'm one of those people who prided myself on always grinding. I used to sign most of my
blogs with "keep grinding," as a salutation. I also used to sleep for 4hrs at night and just conclude that I didn't need much sleep—I could push through. But more and more, my body and mind won't allow me to complete a day without taking a nap (short or long) and lately I'm losing interest in how I spend my time on social media/the phone in general. This waning interest is helping me notice just how plentiful my creative mind is with the proper moments of rest.
This book isn't just about naps and sleeping but it is a powerful testament to what the mind is capable of when we rest by taking naps, daydreaming, looking at the sky or whatever ways you relax, and resist against what this culture is telling us is the only way to exist. In reading Rest Is Resistance, I learned that my creativity, talents and faith can propel me forward which is something I am just now fully leaning into.
Stay tuned...I'm following my intuition (God in me) and allowing a rested Spirit to lead the way.
In the meantime, read Rest Is Resistance, A Manifesto by Tricia Hersey.